Guys, quarter life crisis alert!

"El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First!" (lightningzone) 12/27/2014 at 19:28 • Filed to: None

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I'm 28, I have a good office job, without much field work, at a big MNC. I have a great girlfriend, I found a nice apartment to rent in a good area, for more than a year now, and I drive a half premium car. I didn't let the fact that my dad died a few months ago, affect me too much, because I wanted to stay focused. I wouldn't say my life is too bad, but I feel like I'm just a brick in the corporate wall or a sprocket in a overly complicated Victorian machine.

I always wanted to be a rock star, but I can't sing and I'm not too good with instruments. So I'm thinking at acting. Acting is fun and everybody likes actors, right?

But, I never been to an acting school. I'm on East Coast and the last time I visited Hollywood, America was hosting the summer Olympics. I also think I'm too old to start on this thing. I don't know if asking Oppo for career tips is a smart thing(gf says it's silly), but a few more advices can't hurt.

Conan > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 12/27/2014 at 19:45

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Don't quit the day career. You can use it to get to somewhere with acting lessons and then try out casting calls, the stage, and making YouTube videos in an appropriate location in your spare time.

Slave2anMG > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 12/27/2014 at 19:49

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You're at a point in life where you have the flexibility to chase a dream or two, and enough time to work back to reality if your dreams don't work out. At 28 I'd tell you to go for it. I've worked for big corporations and saw the world on their dime. You are, in fact, just a piece of their machine. They'll be as loyal to you as a snake...which is something I should have realized a bit earlier but I lost my dad at about the same age as you and didn't have him for advice...though he worked for the same company for 49 years.

I work for a German owned company that between the US and German operations has about 200 employees. Family owned by two cousins, 4th generation...a classic German 'mittelstand'. They're good folks to work for. I still don't trust them to be really loyal to me, but I don't feel like I'm having to look over my shoulder 50 times a day. Wish I'd found them earlier frankly.

So my advice as a guy of a certain age - go for it. Give it a couple of years or so. If it doesn't work, you'll have learned some things about yourself and the world. If you don't do it, you'll look back and wonder why you didn't. BTDT...I've come to terms with that but it took time.

Alfalfa > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 12/27/2014 at 19:56

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You should check out your local community theaters. Men in community theater are always a precious commodity, and it can be a lot of fun. You can keep your day job for now and see how you like it.

Makara > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 12/27/2014 at 20:00

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Quarter life? More like mid-life. 76 is the life expectancy for a male in the US. If you were to divide that into young, middle, and old age, each with the same span of years, you have passed young age a few years ago and are now middle aged. Welcome to the rest of your life. :)

El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! > Makara 12/27/2014 at 20:04

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Well, I consider 40 to be mid life epicenter and my great-grandpa lived more than 100 years and fought in both WW.

Steve in Manhattan > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 12/27/2014 at 20:09

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NYU and New York Film Academy have acting programs. There are likely others I don't know about. NYFA I know has open houses once a month - drop by and see what they have. Otherwise, there are websites where they list open auditions. From the podcasts I listen to, the audition process is wrong in every way, but you still need to master it. And working in commercials pays, if you can get it. Best acting gig? Voiceover - you can show up in sweats because the audience never sees you.

Makara > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 12/27/2014 at 20:23

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Around an epicenter is an earthquake and you are in the earthquake of middle age, technically. lol

OPPOsaurus WRX > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 12/27/2014 at 20:28

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I bought aWRX. It helps

Makara > Makara 12/27/2014 at 20:36

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Anyway, do what you want to do in life. Now is the time to do it before you get too old and have regrets about what you should have done in the past. I work in the film biz and can tell you that the percentage of people who make it acting is very small so have a contingency plan, but don't be afraid to go after what makes you happy.

wafflesnfalafel > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 12/27/2014 at 21:58

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Find something you want to do - sounds like acting? Call an agent - just do it. Nothing might come of it or maybe you end up in a local commercial. Then find something else you want to do and do that. And attack every apex.

Little Black Coupe Turned Silver > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 12/27/2014 at 22:06

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27 year old with a theater degree here...

Keep doing what you're doing, unless you are incredibly, deeply, horribly unhappy at your job.

Look into some improv classes or community theater around your area. They will be at night, so you can still have a stable, paying job while still doing fun stuff.

itranthelasttimeiparkedit > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 12/27/2014 at 22:40

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What about moving to a smaller company where you're less of a cog? I worked a few fortune 500-ish gigs in my early 20s and decided I only wanted to work at small companies after that. I dont particularly love the industry we're in (IT,) but I absolutely love my job because I can have a huge effect every single day

BoulderZ > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 12/28/2014 at 01:25

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TL;DR: explore and pursue your options without unnecessarily burning bridges. Adjust accordingly as you go.

I graduated high school in 1992, third in my class, did college on a national merit scholarship (starting in Physics, sucked at math proofs, and loved switching to Geology) for a BS in '96, and did my MS in Geo, finishing in 1998. I couldn't stomach the time and low income the PhD would require, and went right in to US corporate-land. The privately owned company I joined was immediately bought by a giant old guard company that spun us and others off as they circled the drain, purchased by another giant old company that split in to three separate corporations that are in various stages of decay. In August, I was luckily laid off after 13 years of various titles that all boiled down to "Subject Matter Expert", i.e. I actually knew what the customers wanted to do. I did love that job. But! On Monday, I start at one of those customers, where I've always wanted to be. It comes with better benefits, better pay, and a two mile commute (bike, car, walk, run, ski, snowshoe,... hell it doesn't matter at that distance). It's actually across the street from a brew pub. I do not regret the corporate work, though. I doubt I'd have gotten that job without the 13 years of experience in corporate land. I had amazing coworkers there, and I learned a lot about my field and professional life. I'll miss my co-workers, but I'm gaining a lot of awesome new ones while keeping in touch with the old ones. I will not miss the corporation, or it's "management" and attendant parts. I was lucky. I have a fresh start in an amazing job. I'm excited the way I was at HS, BS, and MS graduations. I don't know that I'd have made the jump myself, so I have to say I'm glad for the push. My advice: don't wait for the push.

I feel like I'm just a brick in the corporate wall or a sprocket in a overly complicated Victorian machine.

You feel that way because that's precisely true. That's not necessarily bad, in and of itself (see above...), but be honest about your circumstances. You will be eliminated as soon as a "senior staff" member believes it'll get them five bucks over what they'd get if they keep you. Maybe less. Whether that's a good system or not is a conversation for another day, with many up and down sides to be discussed. Trusting that system to serve your needs and advance your dreams, however, is incontrovertibly foolish. Identify your goals. Artistic expression and outlet? Fame and adulation? Freedom of inquiry? Creativity? Money? Free time? Travel? Family? Name it, and honestly so, and then make the plan. Inaction is not a plan. Complacency never yields fulfillment. Your efforts and plans may not (in some cases, almost definitely will not) work; but not doing a damn thing is 100% guaranteed failure. You only get one go-round on this lovely marble, and there are precious few people who get to the edge of their graves and say, "Yeah, that was perfect, I did it all and did it just right." That nagging voice now will turn in to a scream later, when it might be too late. 28 is still very young. You have great times ahead of you. Don't waste them.

El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! > wafflesnfalafel 12/28/2014 at 14:20

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Hopefully I won't end up on a casting couch for guys, lol.

El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! > OPPOsaurus WRX 12/28/2014 at 15:23

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It only delays the problem until you hit mid-life crisis.

El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! > Alfalfa 12/28/2014 at 15:34

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Wasn't a saying about that? Once you join a community theater, you're stuck in there, forever?

El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! > BoulderZ 12/28/2014 at 15:55

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Well, my company is Japanese, so I don't quite get the all American "we can replace you in one second, fuckface".

Still, the idea that one day I could be hating myself, for being a lazy, complacent, corporate puppy gives me chills.

Alfalfa > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 12/28/2014 at 16:02

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That's what they say, but I've said no to many theaters in the area. They leave you alone after you skip out on a few shows ;)

El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! > Slave2anMG 12/28/2014 at 16:08

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Can't blame a young guy for taking his first actual job at a company who just a few years ago was among the 10 biggest construction companies in the world, a company that was dreaming about building stuff in space. Right?

And trust me, I think about this thing way too much, last night I only got two hours of sleep, because of it. I wish there was an actual path, for me to follow, in a fortune cookie or cereal box or something. That would make things a lot more easier, lol.

El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! > Steve in Manhattan 12/28/2014 at 16:18

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Doing wrong things right, seems better than doing right things, wrong. Or it should be, I think. Still, with all the ageism we have around, I would look like the guy with a Ghostbusters costume at True Blood convention.

El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! > Conan 12/28/2014 at 16:30

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Oh come on. I haven't even went to castings and auditions yet, and I already hear "don't quit your day job"? That's encouraging.

Steve in Manhattan > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 12/28/2014 at 16:31

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Stop that. I am, as near as makes no difference, twice your age. You don't want to look back from here and realize that the chance you should have taken is no longer yours to take.

OPPOsaurus WRX > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 12/28/2014 at 17:04

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well hopefully by then you can afford an STI

El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! > itranthelasttimeiparkedit 12/28/2014 at 17:06

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That would be a compromise. If I can't do something fun, for a living, I don't see why I should face the trouble of looking for a new job.

Conan > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 12/28/2014 at 17:32

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No, no, no. I just meant to give yourself a parachute.

El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! > Little Black Coupe Turned Silver 12/28/2014 at 17:49

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It's not that I'm unhappy with the job, as it's not very hard and the money's pretty good, just that I want more excitement. I want to feel less like a working ant, and more like a pouncing tiger.

El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! > Conan 12/28/2014 at 17:56

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I know, I was just pretending not to get it, like you know, acting...

Conan > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 12/28/2014 at 18:22

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I was going with it! In all seriousness, having a decent corporate job puts you ahead of legions of waitresses and car valets. You just need to transfer to the right location to start your career.

Slave2anMG > El Relámpago(LZone) - Humanity First! 12/28/2014 at 21:33

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Absolutely not - you did exactly the correct thing...the first job I took was with Meganational Inc for the same sort of reasons - big company, stability, etc etc. Had dreams of stepping from that one up to something in automotive or similar...had a head hunter tell me that if I didn't wanna stay in that industry for the rest of my days to move on within 3 years. I stayed there seven. And he was right...still in that industry. Won't get rich here but I make a nice living and in it if I'm halfway good I'll never be out of a job long...and so it's worked out over time

Best wishes - and don't let the bastards get you down and don't be afraid to chase your dreams.